Oh, you're going to hell.

Someone burglarized the sacristy at church this Monday, stealing all the offerings from the Christmas Eve & Christmas Day services.

St Mark's is not a poor church, generally speaking, but we are in debt at the moment, because of the recently-completed remodeling of the parish house (it was long overdue, and went over budget because of the building boom post-Katrina).

The sacristy is not exactly open to the public. Not being a Catholic church, we do not typically have the sanctuary unlocked unless there are people in that part of the building. If memory serves, the sacristy itself is usually locked; and the money was in a safe.

This means that there's a good chance a church member is behind this. Which is just wrong, on many levels. To get to this room, you have to walk past the altar. I suppose we're lucky they didn't steal more; there is a lot in this church that could bring money.

It's distressing, of course. I don't think we have had anything like this happen in the 150-year history of this church. A criminal is a criminal, of course, but somehow stealing from God's house is even more beyond the pale. We do do charity work, and this will make it more difficult. The checks can have payment stopped & be replaced, but the cash is gone. And of course this has probably exposed a good many people to possible identity theft or fraud that reaches far beyond this simple burglary.

This, after we've added a security guard. Well, perhaps that's one expenditure we can cut off for now. Allied Barton obviously hasn't made the church any safer.

Post Christmas Ramblings

The daughter-children are still at Rob's & his parents' until tomorrow morning. He's off work yesterday & today, so he's keeping them a bit longer than normal so he has the whole day with them. I regret suggesting it in a way, because otherwise it'd be only a bit over two hours until they are due home, but they need some Daddy time.

***

Ro tickled the priests at church Wednesday night by hollering "Hooray!" right after the first hymn. I had told her it was time to pray, & she misunderstood what I meant. Rev. Jane said that we'd just been given the good news. Cute, and good timing. I managed to keep her relatively quiet when she then proceeded to get upset that Jonathan Wickham was wearing (to her mind) a dress.

Bobbie sat and colored/drew quietly throughout the service. I was proud. They'll be able to go to church Sunday as well. The lack of churchin' is the one thing I regret about giving Robert every weekend instead of the standard every-other. He made mention of taking them to church, but to an Assemblies of God church. I threatened his manhood. (He was not able to answer the question of why he ever thought it was a good idea to take his children to the same brand o' church that ran him away from God for more than a decade.)

***

I have figured out the secret to cutting onions without crying: safety goggles. If the chemicals can't get to your eyes, they can't make your eyes water. I don't know why I put off buying them so many years, instead trying all the other stupid ideas out there (no, holding a piece of bread in your mouth does not work, nor does slicing it a certain way or doing so under running water--and I can't believe I was dumb enough to try that last hint). Even after reading confirmation of my theory over at Cooking for Engineers, I put it off.

Finally bought a pair at WallyWorld a few months back. And now I eat more onions than anything. Brekkie was 2 eggs, a sliced onion fried in a bit of olive oil, & a couple of slices of maple bacon. Side note here: I hate maple bacon. Meat should not be sweet. At least, bacon should not be.

***

I was lazy & didn't go to church for about the last month of the semester. And so, upon my return, I had to explain several times that I had been working on multiple papers, including a monster 10-pager for Ethics (which I got an A on, thankyouverymuch) and a 5-pager for English that wound up being 9 pages (which I also got an A on, because unless you are Student Development I kick your ass).

The subjects? Resuscitation of Micropreemies and Concealed Carry on Campus. And I wanted to do these. In fact, during my English final, I voluntarily wrote essays on both the Fair Tax & gay marriage. I am apparently truly a libertarian.

***

Anyway, the point about missing church for so long was that I got several comments on how great I looked and a couple of people said it looked like I'd lost weight. Then came the inevitable. So, how'd you do it? Which was answered by kind of a blank look, the suppression of the desire to say "Poverty is a great diet, you should really try it some time!", and the actual answer of "I truly have no idea. I don't even know if I've lost weight, I haven't owned a scale in more than a year."

This is not something most people can comprehend. Funny, to have folks usually quite a bit larger than I (and I am not a small person, y'all) not grasp the concept of constantly being on a diet & constantly weighing themselves.

I do have goals for the upcoming year: Improve my nutrition & get back to lifting weights. Even if the latter consists solely of slinging around the 10lb dumbbells behind my door for a while. Whether this will have an affect on my weight or not, I don't know. I don't particularly care. I just need to get more vegetables into my system, and break the candy habit.

***

I've started playing a free MMORPG called Eternal Lands. I found it back in Hawaii and passed it on to Rob, who started playing it. It bored me at the time, so I never really started.

And yet I've gotten sucked into it. It's pretty boring stuff, for the most part. But simple! And there is a Newbie FAQ available in-game. You just click on the little question-mark button (you know, the one that looks exactly like every other help button on every other computer program) and then click the link that says Newbie FAQ. Then you read it. But people don't like to do this. So they ask idiotic questions in the Newbie Help channel.

They also don't read the text "spoken" to them by NPCs. The first part of the Newbie Quest given by the Tutorial NPC is to pick a flower. ONE FLOWER. And yet, there are constant questions about where to find one of each flower to complete the quest. Sigh.

And now, the server is back up & I'm off to play. Need to kill some bunnies to make hats...

***

One final thought:

Three small children equals eleventy-billion minute toy pieces scattered around the living room. Barbie Peekaboo Petites are the debil.

The Magnificat

46And Mary said:
"My soul glorifies the Lord
47and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior,
48for he has been mindful
of the humble state of his servant.
From now on all generations will call me blessed,
49for the Mighty One has done great things for me—
holy is his name.
50His mercy extends to those who fear him,
from generation to generation.
51He has performed mighty deeds with his arm;
he has scattered those who are proud in their inmost thoughts.
52He has brought down rulers from their thrones
but has lifted up the humble.
53He has filled the hungry with good things
but has sent the rich away empty.
54He has helped his servant Israel,
remembering to be merciful
55to Abraham and his descendants forever,
even as he said to our fathers."

Luke 1:46 - 56; NIV

Today, I remember once again not only the greatness of the Lord, but His great mercy towards the least of us.

Going up the stairs to Tom Gish Hall last night for the CAYA Christmas Eve service, Linda said something to me about Jesus loving the people who are nice to him.

"No, sweetie, he loves everybody, whether we're nice to him or not."

"And that's the amazing part." This from the priest coming up the stairs behind us.

It is.

Merry Christmas to all who believe, and Happy Chanukah to all who believe.

John McCain is watching you!

About two weeks before the first of the month, we were wandering mindlessly around RiverCenter Mall downtown, and went into the music store there. They had a near-life-size cardboard cutout of John McCain, marked down to $5.

"I have to have that!"

Of course, we had no money right then. But my mother asked them if they'd hold it 'til after the first of the month. They agreed. We went back and bought it on the 4th of this month.

What, pray tell, does one do with a near-life-size cardboard cutout of John McCain?

Well, one puts one's Sarah Palin t-shirt on it, of course:



(Er, don't mind the stack o' stuff in the corner. I really need to get to the donation box. I swear it's all clean, though.)

And then, one decides to put it in one's kitchen window, to hopefully freak out the neighbors. And since it is Advent, one puts a Santa hat on it:




(That's kind of a pull-back shot so as to prove I do indeed live in a trailer.)

The girls, by the way, love John.

I'm starting to feel a little merry.

Got the last of the gifts bought today, and wrapped about 2/3 of them in a single setting. Only three remain, dress-up clothes I bought for the girls that need to go into gift bags.

I've slid into the hell of fake trees. They are, quite simply, cheaper and shorter than real ones, both of which are vital considerations right now.

I started out the season with last year's tree, but I had to replace it because pieces of the base had gotten lost. That one cost $10; I replaced it with a $13, 32" fiber optic tree. I don't have to string lights! I hate stringing lights. My ex-husband commented that it's a little short. So is he, but I put up with him many years anyway. Besides, I needed a tree that would fit on top of the dresser.

Little Boy loves it. He thinks the ornaments are dangling kitty toys. I filled up a squirt bottle this morning after he knocked the tree clear off the dresser.

Each daughter is getting four individual gifts. There are also three group gifts--one for each girl to open. I got the Rose Petal Cottage off Amazon for $30 (plus free shipping); that's been set up already in the kitchen. With that exception, only one gift cost more than $10--I bought them a miniature dollhouse for $16. Most gifts cost around $6/each. I bought them a couple each week starting in November. I got my mom a gift, and one for Rob from the girls (a t-shirt, $7.50). Each girl got a $5/gift budget to pick out gifts for each of her sisters. You can see the "from" notations on some of the gifts in the photo. (The gifts are back in the top of my closet, by the way; the cats would eat the wrapping paper if they had half a chance.)

Robert, to my knowledge, hasn't yet bought them a thing. We talked about this about a week or two ago. He plead poverty. This was a few days after he bought a wireless internet fob for his laptop from Cricket, the company we both have our cellphones through. Spent $135 on it. The other day he picked me up after my Psych exam and while I was with him spent $9 on Mountain Dew at Valero. He is even worse with money than I am.

I don't really mean this as an indictment of him. He doesn't mean to be selfish. He is just not used to having to give consideration to things like Christmas gifts. Throughout the course of our marriage & years as parents, he thought to buy exactly one gift for a child. This was in January of 2007, so that meant...let me add...four birthdays for Bobbie...two for Linda (it was her 3rd birthday he bought a present for)...four Christmases for Bobbie...three for Linda...one birthday for Esther...two Christmases...Sixteen gift opportunities, altogether? Is that right? Anyway. It's just not something he's used to thinking about. It was something he always delegated to me. Oops. Actually, there was another birthday for Bobbie before we split up, so seventeen opportunities altogether that he didn't think to do anything for. I'm not certain I believe he bought them anything for their birthdays/Christmas last year and early this year. He did buy Esther two birthday presents this year, but not without calling me from the toy store for help for one and dragging me around the Disney store for help with the other.

I blame his parents. Mainly because I don't like them. But also because he was their golden child, the only bio baby, born after 5 miscarriages. Hell, I'd have coddled him too. (Oh, I did coddle him, come to think of it.) That said, I'm certain they will think to buy the girls Christmas gifts. Still and all, you'd think the guy working full-time would do better at getting presents.

I've heard tales of children of divorce who absolutely cleaned up at Christmastime and on their birthdays, as both parents were competing for their affections. I am confident I am not; this is what I do for them whenever I can. I overcompensate in other ways. I am not certain why I'm the one acting out of guilt for the breakup of their family when I'm not the one who broke it up, but there ya go. I've got way too much guilt for a Protestant. And their father, while loving, is way too clueless to try to buy their affections. Which is probably a good thing, because it means they get an authentic father, even if they don't get him as often now.

On a completely different subject, I am adding The Stupid Shall be Punished and No Slack, Fast Attack to my blogroll. The latter posts only about as often as I do, if not less, but any man who makes fun of the Navy working uniforms so much is a man after my own heart. This post of his from earlier this month says about exactly what I think of both the utilities and the new camos. The switch from dungarees to utilities (which I think look about like a janitor's or bus driver's uniform) came only a couple of months after I got married, but I am glad Rob missed the switch to camos. He liked it when he got to wear the greens (there was a time whenever the men standing topside watch while on duty were authorized 'em, allegedly to make it look like they had real, live Marines up there), but these? Looks like a design the Air Force passed over as being too twee. And WTF is the point of another uniform the junior/midgrade enlisted cannot wear off base? Everyone else gets to, even the Marines.

Here's a picture of Linda helping decorate the tree:

Sheeple 100

I have no idea where this one originated, but when I saw that both MattG & JayG had done it, I had to get in too. (And I'm starting to be damned tempted to change my last name to something starting with a G, just so I can really be a follower.)

1. Started your own blog. I'm guessing this indicates the meme did not start on a blog.
2. Slept under the stars.
3. Played in a band. I've been in a choir, though.
4. Visited Hawaii. If by "visited" you mean "lived there for a year and a half, conceiving & bearing a child," then yes, yes I have. (Best damn Hawaii souvenir ever, baby.)
5. Watched a meteor shower. As a preadolescent, at church camp.
6. Given more than you can afford to charity. Pretty much any time I give to charity, I do this.
7. Been to Disneyland. I hate Disney.
8. Climbed a mountain.
9. Held a praying mantis. As a child, who hasn't?
10. Sang a solo.
11. Bungee jumped.
12. Visited Paris
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea.
14. Taught yourself an art from scratch. More than once. Crocheting, knitting, cooking...
15. Adopted a child.
16. Had food poisoning.
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty.
18. Grown your own vegetables. Community garden, as a child. I've lost the talent now, it seems.
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France.
20. Slept on an overnight train.
21. Had a pillow fight. Not often since I was a newlywed...
22. Hitch hiked.
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill.
24. Built a snow fort.
25. Held a lamb.
26. Gone skinny dipping.
27. Run a Marathon.
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice.
29. Seen a total eclipse.
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset. Rolled home at dawn more than once as an 18-year-old.
31. Hit a home run. Can't catch, can't throw, but damn I can hit.
32. Been on a cruise.
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person.
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors. Considering how many of 'em are from right here in south Texas, that's not very hard.
35. Seen an Amish community. Ft Wayne, IN has its share, apparently.
36. Taught yourself a new language. No. I've studied two in school, so I know how unreliable most of the "teach yourself" materials are.
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied. Not right now. But it was a nice feeling, and it doesn't take much.
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person.
39. Gone rock climbing.
40. Seen Michelangelo’s David.
41. Sung karaoke. I've been drunk, but not that drunk.
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt.
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant.
44. Visited Africa.
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight. Rob, Mark, & I welcomed the new millennium on a beach in Woonsocket, RI.
46. Been transported in an ambulance. Just once, & it was of dubious necessity. And I was really, really paranoid to not have a seatbelt.
47. Had your portrait painted
48. Gone deep sea fishing. No, but I have been on a deep sea fishing trip. I just don't like fish. So I didn't rent a pole.
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person.
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris.
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling.
52. Kissed in the rain.
53. Played in the mud.
54. Gone to a drive-in theater.
55. Been in a movie. No, but I have been in a music video.
56. Visited the Great Wall of China.
57. Started a business. Not a successful one, mind you, but meh.
58. Taken a martial arts class.
59. Visited Russia.
60. Served at a soup kitchen. Nope, but I have assembled sack lunches for the homeless.
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies. I was tops in my troop, beyotches.
62. Gone whale watching.
63. Got flowers for no reason. The ex was quite romantic before going batshit insane.
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma. Two out of three.
65. Gone sky diving.
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp.
67. Bounced a check. Not on purpose.
68. Flown in a helicopter.
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial.
71. Eaten Caviar.
72. Pieced a quilt.
73. Stood in Times Square.
74. Toured the Everglades.
75. Been fired from a job. Heh. One week after being promoted, no less.
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London.
77. Broken a bone. None of my own.
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle.
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person.
80. Published a book.
81. Visited the Vatican.
82. Bought a brand new car.
83. Walked in Jerusalem.
84. Had your picture in the newspaper.
85. Read the entire Bible.
86. Visited the White House.
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating.
88. Had chickenpox. Yeah, I'm 29. We all have, my age & up.
89. Saved someone’s life.
90. Sat on a jury. My one & only summonses came (for Bexar County) when I was living in Portsmouth, VA.
91. Met someone famous. Famous, no. Semi-famous, yes.
92. Joined a book club.
93. Lost a loved one.
94. Had a baby. And I'm damned good at it, too.
95. Seen the Alamo in person. I was there Monday, in fact.
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake.
97. Been involved in a law suit. Filed one, in fact.
98. Owned a cell phone.
99. Been stung by a bee.
100. Read an entire book in one day. 1998. Blue Moon, Laurell K Hamilton. Probably others as well, but that comes to mind right away, as I stayed up all night long to read it. Usually read 1/week.

Things I Have Learned This Semester:

• In spite of not thinking about math unless I'm actually in math class, I am pretty damned good at it. I'm in a remedial course because I never used it (there's really not a use for Algebra in most of the real world). I wonder about the people in the class who graduated from high school only last year.
• I could not tell you the political leanings of three of my four professors, and even the openly liberal one is friendly and respectful of my politics. I like that.
• My list of "Liberals I'd Totally Do" now has two people on it. (No, NOT my professor.)
• Ethics makes me feel smart again. Immanuel Kant's writings make it painfully obvious he was German.
  
• The arguments against concealed carry on campus are getting more and more vapid. According to the editorial in The Ranger, CCoC should not be allowed because (and I am not making this up) it is not an environment conducive to learning. "How can anyone expect a classroom to be run properly with the specter of someone toting a gun hanging in the air?" (Source, but you have to scroll down to the third one.)
• I am such a nerd that I am voluntarily writing an essay on tax policy for my English class. This is not my research paper. My research paper is an argument in favor of allowing concealed carry on campus. Which my English professor supports.
• Ranking professors verges on the idiotic. If I'd answered the evaluation form correctly on Friday, I'd have had to say that I learned nothing from the class. This isn't a knock against the professor, but against the course itself. I actually paid attention in high school. Students in my Ethics class complained that the teacher is hard, even though reviews had said he was a good teacher. Good does not connote easy, for the record.
• School lunches are not any better in college. Whoever conceived of the idea of putting frozen mixed vegetables into General Tso's chicken should be dragged out and shot.
• Modern socialists have no real clue about Marx's theories. Marx, for the record, thought the Russian revolutionaries were idiots.
• National Guard recruiters really are still using the "one weekend a month, two weekends a year" line. On the one hand, it's deceptive. On the other hand, if anyone's dumb enough to believe it...
• I attend college with at least one person who believes MTV is responsible for the downfall of American culture/society. I'm not certain he's wrong.
• Math is required for Anatomy/Physiology. I'm not sure how it applies, as I can't take it yet.
• Unless I kill several of my classmates, I ought to have an A in every course. Even then, as long as I get arrested after the finals, I should be okay. (No, I have no plans to follow through on that musing.)
• My Ethics professor was engaging enough--as was the coursework--that I eventually was able to tune out his verbal tics. However, at odd times I'd still find myself questioning the apparent lack of body hair (full head of hair, full beard/moustache, no chest or arm hair). I have a habit of fixating on bizarre things like that. Still, I <3>

'Tis all for now. Hopefully I will be amusing soon.