Mark: Do you know there's a 'tone check' feature on the latest version of OutLook - to ensure you don't cuss out your boss, when you don't mean to.
me: What if you do mean to?
Does it help you select better expletives?
I can see it now, a little paperclip pops up...
Mark: Then, much like spell check - when you use 'ain't' or 'bling', you ignore it.
me: "I see you've used 'fuck' five times in one paragraph. Would you like me to help you find alternate curse words?"
Mark: LOL yes, actually - it suggested that I was being terse in saying - 'just change the font and move the paragraph'.
I like 'douche-rocket'
; it sounds like a very active noun.
me: That's terse? Its tone-checker works about as well as its grammar checker.
Mark: And really, don't we all benefit from an expletive thesaurus from time to time?
me: The wonderful thing about douche is that it can be attached to virtually any other noun and BAM! instant insult.
Douchecanoe, doucherocket, douchebag, douchechihuahua