Monday, May 10, 2010

My horribly misbehaving children...

So it has recently come to my attention that my daughters' school has a problem with them.

What is it?  Are they bullying smaller kids?  Throwing temper tantrums in class?  Sneaking Diet Coke into breakfast?

Well, no.  It's much, much worse than that.

You see, Bobbie is taking care of Linda.  Every morning they walk into the school building hand-in-hand.  They eat breakfast together.  Then Bobbie walks Linda to her classroom before going to her own.  (She is not, for the record, late to her class because she does this.  When the initial complaint happened, I assumed that was the issue, but it is not.)

And in their world, this is a bad, bad thing.

I'm not sure what world these people live in, but I want no part of it.  I am all-too-aware that we live in a society where it's acceptable to feed your baby something like this so that you don't have to, you know, be a parent when it's inconvenient (and to think I was shocked years ago when I read formula's indigestibility as a reason to use it).  I'm aware that siblings don't always get along.  I'm aware that philosophical egoism is seen as a valid choice by a lot of people I agree with politically.

And I want no part of it.  This is one of the areas where I am incredibly glad for the internet, for the blogs I read and the mamas I keep in touch with via message boards.  If I was still unconnected, I would probably think I was losing my mind.  I know there are other people out there who realize that family members taking care of one another is the way it's supposed to be.

Because isn't it?  If you can't count on your family for support, who the hell can you count on?


Borepatch said...

You might point out this post to them, tell them that you didn't post their names but were reconsidering, and then ask if they wanted to schedule a follow-up meeting with the school district's PR manager.

I'm told that smiling sweetly while you do this is even more effective, but alas I've never been able to squelch the scowl.


Albatross said...

Don't knock baby formula too much. It made us better parents in the long run.

Bob S. said...


So points I would ask about if I was in your position.

1. Exactly what rule or regulation is Bobbie breaking?

2. Exactly why it is an issue?

3. What do they suggest as an alternative?

By being sure you completely understand their issue, you are showing your self to be willing to consider the situation.

In all likelihood, Bobbie is not breaking any rules or creating an issue so they will have a hard time justifying this.

Then cut them off at the frakkin knees.

The probable issue is Bobbie (and you via Bobbie) are undermining the conditioning and control the school has over Linda.

Last tip, if the school level folks get to you.....use the magic words "Who at the district can I talk to concerning this issue".

Patrick said...

I'd love to hear the follow-up on this story, when there is one. I'm dying to find out what part of your children's behavior was unacceptable.

(I'm a father of three small children entering school in the next two years, and I fully expect to get letters home from school. I can only hope it's for something as tame as this.)

Sabra said...

Patrick, I'm not sure there really is going to be a follow-up. They came really close to my jumping their shit last week when one of the teachers apparently blocked Bobbie and Linda from walking to breakfast together, but it didn't repeat. I'll go postal on them if it does.

They're definitely not going back to that school next year. There is a charter school right next door to where we live that my sister has sent her youngest to his whole educational career, and she has nothing but good things to say about it. That's going to be my fall-back plan, but I want to see if I can get them into the San Antonio School for Inquiry and Creativity, another charter school. And I have applications in for a brand-new school being built nearby.

John B said...

Sabra, I have never met a teacher at a public school who was worth a damn at teaching. They are matchless experts at indoctrinating helpless children.

Larry Niven said he preferred writing because he didn't have to stop to debate the issues like a teacher would. Obviously it's been awhile since he saw the inside of a classroom.

I attended a parent teacher conference with a friend once. She didn't want to face them alone. Finally I exploded and told them.
"The only reason she has her kids in school here is that the law would sanction her if she didn't. She's too broke, and too uninformed as to any alternatives. All you lot really care about is trying to force the kids into your conformist mold. That and grabbing more political power so your incompetent ass doesn't get fired."

I then told them if she got a complaint about schoolwork, fine, we'd both ride the kid 'til he/she got back to acceptable.

But another BS rap about behavior, and that teacher could expect Bikers doing brodies on their front lawn. And all sorts or psych warfare 'til that teacher sought their true vocation as a fry-flipper or pole dancer.

Stick to your guns darling.
after all, they won't see your kids after the year. You have to raise them to adulthood. who should have the greater say?

Wenche said...

And in addition to all these good advice, concidere these as well: Talk with a low but very firm voice. Look them straight in the eye when talking. Make sure you don't use fillers like "eemmmm". Doesn't sound good. And as they told you when you were younger: sit up straight! With all this you are in controll (on the outside) and they can't talk you down. It works, I know.