I don't want to be a downer all the time.
So I'll share with you what happened to me yesterday.
I was walking up Walzem with my mother & the girls, headed to the bus stop. There was a woman walking towards us. When she got to me, she said, "I'm glad you're coming this way, because I was looking for you."
I stopped and tried rapidly to figure out who she was. I couldn't remember seeing her before.
"God told me to find you. He told me to give you this," she said, & pressed a $20 bill into my hand.
What do you say to something like that? I went for "Thank you," my mother went for "God bless you." She hugged me, told me Merry Christmas, & walked off.
Funny thing is, that was the second time this week something very similar happened to me.
Tuesday, on the 17 bus going out to the Park & Ride, again with my mom & the girls, the lady sitting behind me on the bus asked, as we approached the P&R, if she could give my girls some candy. Never one to bypass candy from strangers, I accepted. When we got off the bus, she stopped me again & asked if I'd be offended if she gave me some money for food for the girls. I said no, and she gave me $20 and walked off after I thanked her.
I'm not going around begging. I'm trying hard to keep up appearances, as it were. But that $40 made a welcome difference, I won't lie.
I was thinking last night about the woman, who had told me God sent her to find me. It wasn't random. She walked past other people to me.
I'm Episcopalian, a denomination I've jokingly called "Christianity for Nerds". If God spoke to me directly, I'd probably go looking for a psychiatrist, just to be on the safe side.
But I've had a few times where things went cosmic. A time when I was 18 or so and taking Communion was an overwhelming experience. I've been happy this past week because I've been added to the lay reader list at church, and doing the readings this Sunday was unexpectedly moving.
This was the first time God has been this direct. I have a wonderful feeling of having been comforted, sort of a pat on the back and the whisper that everything will be OK in the end.
Probably not in the way I expect, but that's fine.